Bullying is not something that is new or groundbreaking, but
it is a more prominent topic of conversation today. We often hear that bullies
are pushing other children to their breaking points and beyond. When I hear
these stories, they have a special meaning to me, because I was a victim of
bullying myself for years, and it was the most difficult time of my life. I
wasn’t the best at anything, I didn’t live in the same development as everyone
else, I moved to the area in the middle of elementary school, I was short, and
had a big mouth. I had a lot of things working against me and what made it
worse was my lack of friends. It took many years of torment from a few
individuals until I was able to break free and become confident enough to get
out from under their control.
When I was
bullied, it was a mixture of physical and verbal abuse that was continuous at
school. I was able to find ways of staying out of sight in order to avoid being
made fun of. While these tactics worked for me to make it through a school day,
children today aren’t nearly as lucky. Not only are they tormented while at
school face to face with their assailants, but then they go home and get online
to receive even more abuse. The world of social media has spawned a new wave of
ways for bullies to attack their victims and create a relentless attack. The
blessing of instant access to each other online has become a double edged sword
that creates an attack pit for bullies to attack on a round the clock basis.
If bullies
have so many opportunities and avenues to torment, how are we supposed to stop
them? Well, a Tulsa public school has done just that, and created a way to anonymously
report and describe bullying and where and how it is taking place. This will
hopefully allow students to feel comfortable enough to speak up and tell
someone, and have the people listening make a difference. Students often feel
like they are unable to say anything about bullying, because they don’t know
where they can turn in order to find help.
There are ways of dealing with
bullying, that aren’t the confrontational and classic “fight back”, because
violence rarely solves violence. You can confront the bullying in much the same
ways as ju jitsu, and use their force and power and use it against them. We can
teach our students to take away the power from the bullies by teaching
confidence. But we can’t stop with teaching it, we must help to build it,
through creating active relationships and teaching them to not allow the
insults to carry weight. While this is easier said than done, it is possible,
because I am living breathing proof.
The power of a confiding word is
much more powerful than one might expect. Being accessible is the first step
that we can take as a teacher to help support our students. We also need to let
our students know that there is more to life than school and that there is
something to look forward to. Many large companies have stepped forward to pass
on the message of “it gets better”. This is a message to help young people who
are struggling with their sexuality and the challenges that come with it, and
it lets them know that people care and things are only going to go up. This
message is vitally important because students need hope and to know that just
because things are bad now, it doesn’t mean that this is how things are always
going to be. We also need to play an active role in ensuring that we do not
allow any form of bullying to take place in or outside of our classroom if we
can. I know that from my own experiences growing up, that I will be doing whatever
it takes to stop bullying to the best of my abilities.
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